‘X Plan’ aims to help parents allow children to make mistakes
I’ll admit I know nothing about parenting. So when I started reading local author Bert Fulks’ book X Plan Parenting I wondered what I would get out of it. Little did I know that it would take me on a journey of self discovery. There are so many stories that I can relate to as the “child” in the situation that once Bert explains the parent’s side or point of view I came to see my own parents in a different light.
Now I could just sum the book up by saying it’s an easy plan. Your child is in a situation that they realize they need out of. They text you an X and you either call or text them back with a way out of the situation.
But it’s so much more and I’m sad to say while I think that most parents would do the X Plan, I’m not sure some could handle the second part.
You see once they text you that X and they are safely back with you, you have agreed to not ask questions. That’s right. No questions. No lectures and certainly no harping. Why? Well by doing any of those things especially in a negative or judge-mental way you risk two things. One you’ve broken your word along with their trust and two your child next time may stay in the situation to avoid having to face the same reaction from you again.
Bert could have stopped once he wrote the X Plan article, but sometimes God has other ideas. I feel that Bert was also led to dive into why the parent might feel the need or have the gut reaction to want to lecture, ask questions and try to help.
Try as they might some parents just can’t not interfere. They can’t let their child make mistakes, fail at something or not be the best in whatever thing they try. Bert goes into this in detail and provides Godly advice on how things could be handled better. He draws upon experiences from both his own childhood and those of being a parent. Some of the examples hit so close to home for me that if I didn’t know better I would swear we had grown up together.
This book is a wonderful read and a wealth of information. Bert’s writing style is that of a friend talking to you and trying to help you be the best you can be. Give this one a read you won’t be sorry. It’s also perfect for a book club or a church group.